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Vladimir WTF

It's been too long.

I think everyone ever has forgotten about these guys. Good news, though! I don't care, I'm posting anyway! 8D

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This is an excellent start! A portrait of Greta! For no reason! Best. Update. Ever.

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Hermia questions the cuisine offered in this establishment. I'd wonder about salad for breakfast, too though.

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Remember Lorna Faye? She's still visiting. Still likes the custom hair, Calliope.

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Hermia: *discovers her OTH*
Ian: *feels as though something wonderful has happened*

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Greta: Blah, blah, blah! That one's not even mine...I don't think... What do I care about games?

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Greta: Games are boring and stupid!
Ian: LALALALALA CAN'T HEAR YOUUUU.

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Isana and Effie: *greet each other*
Ian: *me gusta face*

No, it doesn't matter to him that they are mother and daughter. Think of his history. You aren't surprised.

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Isana got a makeover. Don't make a big deal out of it.

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Greta: I choose to disregard boundaries. Hey, Finn.
Finn: Sup, Greta. Kinda busy...

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Greta: I think I'm in love~!
Finn: Heh heh...that's not weird...or anything...

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The Dog: That's it! The ring! Precioussss...

She is still nefarious.

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Hermia: I hate Calliope. Everything about her disgusts me. Cheers!

To be honest, I'm not even sure if they've met, with so many sims running around and all.

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Isana: How dare you! If there is one thing we do not tolerate in this house it is arbitrarily hating our siblings! In-laws, of course. Spouses, intermittently. But SIBLINGS! ARE! SACRED!

Isana? Calliope isn't her...you know what, nevermind. Preach.

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Farthing: There can never be too many children. Let's order one from that catalog we got the other day!

No.

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Ian: Your kiss is cosmic.
Greta: Funny you should mention that!
Benny: *is all up in the stereo's personal bubble*

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Greta: I happen to be 1/8th alien!
Ian: Oh, I know! Soup was a sexy lady...one that got away, but I made up for it, didn't I?
Benny: *still*

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Ian: *gossips about that one time when Greta got electrocuted*
Isana: The weight machine, you say? Oh what scandal!
Greta: Ian is so attractive when he's talking shit about me to my sister-in-law.
Benny: Good chat, I have to go torment her now, I think. :)

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Isana: So, yeah, you know your sister Clara?
Greta: Doesn't ring a bell, but go on.

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Isana: ...she died once!
Greta: How crass!
Ian: Ugh, mortals.

That's funny, because as I recall (correctly) it never happened.

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Greta: So, Ian's been kind of ignoring me lately, so I want to do something to show him what he's missing. Whatsay we make out or something?
Ian: *me gusta face*
Finn: *swoops the f*k in out of nowhere* *me gusta face*

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Greta: Plus, it's not like we could get pregnant from it!
Isana: I am amenable, but DO NOT talk to me about BABIES. >8[

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Speaking of babies! All of ours are doing homework.

The Butler: Oh. My. God. Learning?!? What is this...I can't even...

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The Butler: I think I'm gonna be sick. Oh...oh god...they're doing math. Urk--brup...huhweh

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Bitte: I'm judging you for assuming it was the homework that made our dear Orlando ill. I'd wager it was more likely the week old muffin mix on our Easy Bake. Also, I'm judging the others for not finishing their studies as quickly as I did. And finally, my hair, for doing whatever it is doing to my face right now.

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And then I caught Finn and Isana engaged in a steamy kiss. No seriously. Literal steam.

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It was so...intense..that he carried the heat of it to work with him.

(I don't actually know why Finn had a steaming face. He just did. For no reason.)

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The Dog: FUCK THE POLICE!

Had to be done. /noregretschicken.gif

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And another one's gone and another one's gone, and another one bites the dust. *FORESHADOWING*

Then Ian rolled a want to invite Purity over, so we shooed poor Beth.

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Greta: Ha! I'm not worried. Totally not jealous at all. I mean, she doesn't even have green hair!
Purity: *agrees to come, but only if she can bring a friend to chaperone*

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Purity: *come hither face* Oh, hello, Ian. How nice to see you. This is...Chaper...uh...Chappie. Heh.
The Butler: *headbutt to the boobs, as per custom*
"Chappie": Yeah, I'm gonna need cash up front after all...

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Purity and Chappie: *deal with the business end of their transaction*
Ian: Oh, hey, listen, in case this whole thing over here doesn't pan, come on in and stay a spell.
Deanna: Oh, why thank you. I'm new in this town, so it would be lovely to meet you all!

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Deanna: Excellent, I've infiltrated the locals. >:D

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Ian: Okay, self, don't screw this up. You gotta be the opposite of you with this one. DO NOT THINK ABOUT GRETA AND HOW EASY THAT WOULD BE, SELF. We *like* this challenge.
Chappie: I give zero fucks about this whole thing. There better be food.

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...you don't say. >:}

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Bitte: *judges herself for once*

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Bitte: Practically perfect in every way. Naturally.

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Bitte: You should know I excel at everything.
Isana: I think that one is talking to me...ignore it, it will pass.

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Bitte: UGH! WHY DOES EVERYONE REFUSE TO ADMIRE HOW AWESOME I AM AT LIFE?!
Eventide: *mocks, in a bff-ly kind of way*

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Purity: Yeah, so, I have this "friend" who would really like you. My "friend" thinks you're super pretty and smart and interesting. Can I give my "friend" your number?
Farthing: Yeah, I'm kinda married and also old and also I don't like how you keep saying "friend," so. I'm all set, thanks.
Ian: Aww, come on! This could have been a win win win situation for all three of us!

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Everyone in the House Old Enough to Swoon: *does so*

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Ian: Oh, my sweet, chaste queen. Thou art...so...lovely. I think lovely was okay, I don't know, what word doesn't mean 'I want in your pants like it's a cure for cancer'?
Purity: Oh, Ian. I fall in love all over again everytime we meet!
Isana: Seriously? Kissing her hand? That works? Okay then...

No seriously, this is like the 4th time she's fallen in love with him, I don't even know.

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Isana: I love the smell of birthday cake in the evening. Smells like dissolving responsibility!

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Ender: YAY I GET TO BE IN THE UPDATE AT LAST!

MAKEOVERS FOR EVENTIDE AND ENDER!
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I'm satisfied.

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Greta: Well, hello! Just how related are we again, is there a family tag? Because, I'm jsut sayin'.
Purity: Oh my, so are you a full time beefcake, or...?

I used beefcake. I'm not sorry.

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Ian: Oh em gee, I still can't believe that about Clara...

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Ian: I mean she was all like 'Ooo, I'm a ghooost nooow~!' HA!

Still. Never. Happened.

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Isana: That Benny, though. I fkn hate that guy.
Ian: Ha ha---wait.

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Ian: Too far, dude. Benny's my bro.
Isana: Your disapproval pleases me.

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Isana: So anyway, about Clara...
Ian: Oh yeah, breathe right in my ear...

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Isana: What the fuck? How dare you talk to me about aliens! HOW. DARE. YOU.

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Bitte: When mother's temper changes so violently, it hurts me on the inside. >':

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Calliope: Pull yourself together before I backhand you, soldier! We shall march on and conquer!

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Evidently Calliope's been taking some college level classes in her spare time. And she's discovered the desk no one has used in forever.

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OH GOOD. I GET TO KEEP ALL FIVE OF THEM ALL DAY AND NOT GET A BREAK. JOY OF JOYS.

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Greta: Oh hello, Ian~. What a surprise to see you here. In your own bathroom.
Ian: Portal 2 got five stars? That game was okay, but it isn't Pokemon Black. Or White.
Newspaper: *is used in lieu of censors, because Greta is indeed naked*

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Ian: You do that, Beth. You should look especially pretty today, see as it's how you're going to look forever

What? His timeline's getting close to the end. Time to recharge.

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Ender: I'm laughing to hide my fear. Who is this woman?
Uninvited Eyebrows: Isn't this cozy and fun?! 8D

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Nope. Creepy and weird.

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Uninvited Eyebrows: So, here's an expensive free thing, how about we work out a deal for the kid?
Ian: Don't know, don't care, not my kid, goodbye.

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Well obviously you need at least three of these before you can even begin to say you've lived.

Ian: I hope Greta doesn't turn into a total witch when she figures out I'm not going there again...

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Bitte: What do you mean you could make room for two "bffs"? I am judging you and your untoward behavior. And this sandwich, is that mayo?!
Farthing: I sense evil afoot. It shall be banished from this house!

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And so it was. And Beth Steele lives another day.

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Ian: Eh, life essence is life essence. To living forever!

And that was it for this update! Have a day!

Want a Withers?

Comments

You got my commentary in IM but *marks with scent*

This is my comment. I internet-peed on it.
I'll never wash this lj again. OwO
*cautiously steps over the scent mark*

YAY, WITHERS. <3 I never forgot about these guys. I tend to read older updates of them when I'm eating dinner. It still amuses me greatly.

Ian? You are still one of my favorites.
I go read my old updates sometimes, too. All the cool kids do.

Ian is clearly my favorite, seeing as how he continues to live, and will live forever.

Thanks for not forgetting!
Oh gosh, Ian. Will you be making him a vampire or just keeping him as his normal human loveable dirty old man self? :D
I wouldn't say he's exactly human, but I won't be making him a vampire of a zombie or anything. He lives off the life essence of former lovers.
DUDE. I just super belatedly figured out what he is. He's an incubus! They live off the essence of former lovers!

*feels smart*
NEVER FORGET.

Steamy face, swoon-a-thons, univited eyebrows, beefcakes, oh my! Still love The Dog, even more so with his NWA shenanigans. :D
I seriously Do Not know what happened with Finn's face. The swooning is pretty much constant.

Uninvited Eyebrows was definitely uninvited. About once a day some random town walks right in, but usually they swoon over Ian for an hour or two, then leave. (Thus, the Ian Fan Club Representative storyline.) Eyebrows, however, was all about some Ender. I dunno. She's dead now, so.

The Dog will probably have to live on with Ian forever, because she is just too funny to give up!

Thanks for NEVER FORGETTING~!
Poppy

October 2014

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