We'll start with the twins! Virtue on your left, Honor on your right. Honor's cuter.
Virtue has Livi's eyes.
Honor has her father's coloring. Like I said, cuter.
Greta: Oh, wow! How is it possible I hadn't noticed THIS masterpiece before?! It's a stunning work of art!
Purity: What the fuck, Greta? Can you not see--
Ian: Shh. Just let her be here.
Purity: If you insist...
Greta: Yep. I love...art.
Honor: Isana says it's never too early for the birds and the bees!
SOMETIMES IT IS OH MY GOD. WHY?! WHY DO THEY DO THIS?!
The Sims: Stomping on Boundaries since 1746. (Google it.)
Isana and Benny: *scuffle*
Finn: Oh my. I think my inner goddess just pole vaulted onto her chaise lounge.
If you get that reference then you are just as guilty as I am, so don't judge me.
Finn: My inner goddess is salsa dancing.
Isana: You make my kundalini noir quiver.
Again: you + getting the references = JUST AS GUILTY
Eventide: Hey, Finnegan. Nice job being attractive. You don't have any other special capabilities, but at least you have that.
Hermia: So, this is where Ian and Purity sleep. Cool, cool. I don't really know why I'm here.
Calliope: Oh my Hannah, Ender, your impression of Finn is, like, SPOT ON.
Ender: I know, right? It's like I don't even have to try.
Finn and Isana: If we're lucky! *eyebrow waggles*
Farthing: I suppose so.
Benny, Ender and Eventide: If we pretend it's not happening, then it isn't!
Hermia: ...why are you stroking me, Hula Death?
Calliope: Oh, no! Grandma! Why am I the only one reacting appropriately?!
The Dog: Ah, the death of another of these foolish humans. I'ma sleep like a baby tonight!
Greta: Hey, guys, what's going on over here?
Ghost of Rosebob: It is DEFINITELY Michelle's fault!
Ghost of Rosebob: everything.
Thomasina: Hey, Gramps. Heard you got remarried.
Ian: Yeah, you should really try it sometime! I've done it three times, myself. They keep dying though, dunno what that's about!
Thomasina: One too many "rocket rides," probably. At least they die happy!
Ian: I never thought of that, you're probably right!
They're happy until he remarries, anyway.
And now, a series of art photography I call "Ender and Eventide Grow Up"
Isana, the remix, more or less.
Oh, hello. Hi. Hey. Eventide turned out. Yeah. Is gud.
Grim: Okay, you've seen this before, grab the suitcase and let's go.
Benny: :0 Is *everyone* dressed like that where we're going?!
The Dog: :0 Another one so soon?!
The Dog: It's so...beautiful!
Everyone but Isana: Benny! >8
Isana: Fuck off, all of you! I'm glad he's dead!
beescratch: NEVER LETTING IT GO.
Eventide: Well, I better go see what I can of the world before the heir poll. I might have to come back!
You don't have to rush, you have time to open the cab door...
Eventide: The what? Oh, I never bother with moving things out of my way! I just move right through them!
Right. I forgot about that. Cool.
And then I remembered about Benny's urn. Heh. Sup, Pearl?
Greta: Aww, look at you with your blue eyes and dark hair. Aren't you a pretty thing!
Honor: 8> Yis. I am.
Naturally, Greta bonds with the baby that most resembles Ian.
Kevin: It's like they don't even know I exist! I feel like I've been forgotten!
The Dog: There, there. You tell The Dog all about it, kiddo.
Kevin: You're the only one who I can talk to! The only one who understands!
The Dog: That's it, let it all out.
Kevin: I feel so much better!
The Dog: Yes, you'll do nicely... >:)
There's an empty bed, and a sleepy Purity. An *empty* bed. And a *sleepy* Purity. ...Nope, I can see no way in which these two things could possibly be combined. Must have been a prt scr misfire.
A second series of art photography that I will call "BIRTH ALL THE DAYS."
Virtue, better, but still just okay.
Honor, still cuter, but also just okay.
Kevin, like a blond Harry Potter: Looks just like his father, except for the eyes. He has his mother's eyes.
Finn, who is annoyed I got him out of bed for this shit.
Bitte, who is annoyed in general, at her lack of presence thus far in the update. BUT WHOA, HI, GORGEOUS.
And finally Calliope, who further dooms my ability to cast a single heir vote.
CHOOSE ALL THE HEIRS.
The local werewolf takes a break from stealing papers to get his workout on. At night.
Honor: I like my muffins like I like my hopes and dreams. Up in smoke, burned to the ground, and barely recognizable.
Honor: Have you met my friend, Harem?
We have, that was Pearl's move. Nice try though.
Okay, Ian Fan Club. Now you're not even trying! What the hell kind of name even is that?!
Kevin: Why am I so alone?!
Isana: Dude, relax. If you got noticed, you might have to stay.
Kevin: But. I. WANT. ...wait...
Kevin: MOM! Does this mean you love me?! Did we just become best friends?!
Isana: WHOA. Slow down there freight train. I was just tired of the sobbing sounds. Back it up.
Kevin: She loves me. 8>
Greta: Hey, Ian! Take your pants off and between the three of us, we could ave an all stars party!
Winrar: There's an extra charge for that, but go ahead, I'll wait.
Ian: Actually, I think I'll just watch for pointers, if that's cool.
Greta wants to woohoo 20 sims. She never said anything about being unwilling to *pay* for a couple of them.
Hermia, grown, also noticeably absent from the update thus far. Again, my heir choice has been made nigh to impossible.
Kevin: Please, may I join your merriment?
Virtue: Oh hell no. Uh-uh.
Honor: Who even *are* you?
Honor and Virtue: We'd rather take turns punching each other than be seen with the likes of whoever that kid is.
Kevin: I just want to be included...just once...
Greta: *plays piano in a slinky pink dress*
Ian: Man, I love music.
Isana: Hey, congrats on finally loving something besides yourself and women!
Ian: Yeah, they come by every day, and want me to make out with them and whatnot. I don't usually...
Greta: Oh, I know exactly what you mean!
Isana: What do you mean you "don't usually!?"
Ian: It's just that they all seem so manufactured, you know? Like I AM A ROBOT, PLEASE LOVE ME.
Greta: Yeah, total squares...er...triangles...whatever, I get what you are saying.
Isana: Who cares? They can come straight off the assembly line and to my pants party!
Greta: Let's be honest, though, we both just want Ian. Me again, you for the first time.
Isana: Don't tell Finn, but GUILTY. lulz
Purity: I heard you talking. I am your wife, so clearly I am something special.
Ian: Prove it.
Purity: *proves it*
Greta: Ugh, it's like a train wreck, I can't even watch...
Ian and Purity: *keep proving it*
Greta and Isana: *cannot look away*
Ian: Man, that Greta sure is hot.
Greta: Hey! good job kissing him in such a way that he is reminded of me!
Purity: Don't care what he's thinking, so long as it's me he's touching.
Greta: I don't blame you for feeling that way, he's wicked hot.
Isana: NO, YOU COULD NOT PLAY A MOVIE VERSION OF CHRISTIAN GREY. THAT MOVIE SHOULD NEVER BE MADE.
Ian: All I'm saying is that I have the same raw magnetism as his character! Keep your shirt on, jeez! ...Or don't, actually. Don't keep your shirt on.
Ian: Plus, among all his moral flaws, apparently the one thing he doesn't do is cheat! HA! I cheat all the time!
Purity: I am standing right here. You can see me standing here.
Greta: Seriously, though, I cheat on my fiance so often, I bet no one even remembers I *have* one!
Ian: I didn't remember! I like your style!
Purity: STILL HERE.
Ian: Of course you can be a doctor when you grow up, sweetie!
Virtue: Thanks, dad! I knew you'd support me!
Purity: My babies! 8>
Ian: Lord knows you need to pick something lucrative, since you won't be living here past teenhood!
Virtue: Because college?! 8D
Ian: No, because generation three was over ages ago. You're out once you're old enough.
Purity: My babies! 8|
Virtue: It's simple. I must kill my twin to complete the spell, and then heirship will be mine!
Ian: ...I'm just gonna pretend I heard nothing. Yep. La la la. NOTHING.
Guess how many showers/tubs there are in this house.
Guess how many of them are occupied/broken.
Guess who is just doing this for attention.
The Dog: Hello stranger. Might I interest you in some enigmatic plotting against the hands that feed us?
The Hound: Why, yes! You might!
AAAAANNNNDDDD we're done!
Want a Withers?
EXCEPT OH WAIT! HEIR POLL!
I wasn't originally going to do an heir poll this round, since it's been forever, BUT, I can't help myself, I'm doing one anyway. But Kevin and Ender aren't in it, because Ender is just Isana revisited, and Kevin is just Benny revisited. Meh. So, the remaining contenders!
Pick your poison!